One Drunken Night
by WarriorOfTheWeek
Summary: We've all had them, yes even our friends the Avengers! Stories of drunken nights and mornings after with our favorite superheros! Leave requests if you have any!
1. Thor

**If you have an idea for a chapter, don't hesitate to tell me. I will be HAPPY, no, OVERJOYED to write your idea. (: **

Thor woke with a groan. Bright sunlight assaulted his eyes and he moaned, snapping them shut again. After a lingering moment he forced himself to open his eyes all the way, he saw he was in the banquet hall in his home Azgard. Stiffly pushing himself into a sitting position, he took in the scene around him. It seemed a great party had taken place, for food littered the floor as well as empty wine cups, shredded curtains, and an occasional passed out friend laying motionless on the floor. The golden room made everything look brighter, and he had to squint so as not to make his headache worse. If only he could remember what happened last night… there was a party… Loki was there… he remembered drinking with his brother but then…things got fuzzy. He groaned again, this time, bringing his hands up to rub his bloodshot eyes. He heard the unmistakable chuckle from behind him, and turned to look over his shoulder just as his younger brother stepped out from behind a golden pillar.

"How are you feeling, brother?" Loki chimed stopping a couple feet away from Thor, his features twisted in his trademark grin.

Thor, rubbing the left side of his face asked, "How long have you been standing there?"

Loki approached, still grinning. Thor remembered they had drank…a lot. He looked his brother up and down and felt confusion. He looked for all the signs of a hangover on the younger man, but found none. Loki's eyes were clear and, gleaming, Thor noticed. The underneath of Loki's eyes were circle free, he wasn't shielding them from the sunlight, and he didn't look nauseated, in fact, he was holding an apple in his right hand. Thor shook his head and rested his head in his hands.

"How are you not feeling absolutely wretched right now?" he asked, pushing the blonde hair out of his face.

Loki shrugged, and replied breezily, "I do not get hangovers." then walked over and sat on the step next to Thor. He outstretched his arm and offered the apple to Thor. "Would you like one?"

Nausea swelled up in him at even the sight of the apple and he turned his head away. He took several deep breathes to keep his stomach from heaving, and he heard Loki chuckle deviously. After he had reclaimed control over his stomach, he turned his gaze back to his brother. Loki was grinning at him contentedly, his elbows on his knees, an heir of importance surrounding him. Thor knew that Loki's importance grew when he knew something Thor didn't, and judging by the look on his face, he knew a lot of what happened last night. Suddenly Thor felt as though there was a second being present in his own thoughts and his suspicion was confirmed a moment later when Loki said, "You know that I know what happened last night. And it is absolutely killing you!"

Thor wanted to jump to his feet and whirl to face Loki, but remembering his condition, he rose slowly and turned carefully to face the younger man.

"Stop doing that!" he growled. He knew full well of Loki's power to read minds and walk in the dreams of others, but his brother knew how much Thor hated it, so he rarely used that particular power on him.

"Why?" Loki asked innocently, his green eyes wide, giving him a childish look.

"Because its not fair!" Thor spat back. He started to limp away, one hand on his aching back, the other on his stomach.

Loki rose easily from where he was seated on the stair. With a small wipe of his hand the apple disappeared and he hurried after Thor, smiling.

"Where are you going?" Loki called, leaving space between Thor and him.

"To my chambers." he stopped suddenly, the ground lurching beneath his feet. "As soon as the ground stops moving."

Now Loki was beside him, his hand on his shoulder to help steady the Thors swaying. Suddenly there was an angry cry and both the men turned to look across the banquet hall. A young woman Thor remembered not was storming toward him. She had a stain down the front of her dress and fire in her brown eyes. Loki took a step back and she stormed right up to Thor and slapped him across the face. "How dare you?!" she snarled. Then turned on her heels and stormed back out. Dazed, he reached up and touched his burning cheek and looked after her. He turned, and saw Loki give him a knowing look.

"Brother," Thor started, alarm rising inside of him. "What happened last night?"

Loki grinned. "I thought you might want to know." he took a deep breath and Thor knew he was going to drag this out as long as he could, giving each important detail painfully slow. Loki loved being in control, and right now Thor was at his mercy.

"What do you remember?" Loki asked.

"I remember arriving here for Lady Sif's birthday, then you and I were drinking and then…" he shook his head. Loki smiled.

"That is all you remember?"

"Yes."

Loki sighed and shook his head. He circled Thor and then gestured to an over tuned chair.

"You may want to sit down, brother."

Thor pushed down the panic rising inside of him and forced his already unsteady legs in the chairs direction. Loki sat down in the chair opposite of his brother and took in a breath to speak but paused.

"Maybe you would rather not know." Loki stated.

"Loki," Thor said warningly.

"Fine, fine." Loki waved his hands in defeat and started, "Well, you started drinking heavily-"

Thor cut him off defensively, "I remember, you were as well."

"Would you like me to continue?" Loki asked sharply.

"Yes," Thor mumbled begrudgingly.

"We _both_ were drinking a lot, but I less than you. Unlike you, I know when to stop." Loki paused and Thor bit his lip to keep from giving another defensive reply.

"We ran out of alcohol, so you asked me to conjure some-"

"Why didn't you try to stop me?" Thor interrupted again.

Loki sent him a sharp glance and Thor looked at the floor and mumbled, "Sorry."

"I tried." he paused and rolled his sleeves up, reveling arms covered with bruises. "Unfortunately, drunken Thor is not as…considerate of my wellbeing as sober Thor."

Thors eyes widened as he looked at the black and blue marks running up and down the younger mans arms. He gasped in disbelief, "I did that?"

Loki grinned and rolled his sleeves back down. "Oh don't worry, I managed a few good blows. How do you think you ended up with that awful shiner?"

Thor thought his face hurt! He ran his fingers over the aching side of his face and cracked a small smile. "Hopefully you knocked some since into me?" he asked hopefully.

Loki chuckled. "I obviously didn't hit you hard enough, because you still wanted your mead. So, I did as you asked."

"What else happened?"

"Well, after our 'disagreement' you proposed marriage to Lady Sif ."

Thor gasped his eyes flying open wide, "She said no right?!"

Loki gave him a confused look. "Of course." Loki grinned mischievously and couldn't help but adding, "She's not attracted to you."

"Hey…" Thor warned again, although this time there was an underlying tone of playfulness in his voice.

"After that you got extremely hungry and ate out of random peoples plates, very rudely, if I may say so."

"No you may not." Thor groaned half-heartedly.

"Anyway, adding to your list of embarrassments, you jumped on a table and began to sing a human song."

Thor looked up sharply. "Which song?" he demanded.

Loki looked away sheepishly and mumbled, "I, err, don't feel comfortable repeating it."

"Oh gods." Thor mumbled feeling his face flush red.

"Well as if that wasn't enough, the table broke and you ordered for it to be executed at once." Loki continued.

"Please tell me this story is over." Thor pleaded.

"I wish, brother, I wish."

Thor groaned.

"Soon after you made your way up to the balcony up there," Loki paused and pointed to the corner of the room where there was a tall balcony where Father and Mother usually sat, "And made a long speech about how much you loved the mead I had conjured and how you where convinced that unicorns were the resolve of all our problems. Then you got emotional, and promptly threw up into the crowd."

Thor flinched.

"By the way you owe me a new cape."

Thor frowned in disgust, "I'm so sorry."

Loki shook his head dismissively and added, "The girl next to me took the brunt of it. All down her dress. You passed out after that, ending your reign of drunkenness."

Thor breathed heavily out his nose. Then his face became puzzled. "You know, now that I think about it, my drinks didn't taste like the typical mead I am used to."

Loki smiled evilly and leaned in close to Thor's ear and whispered, "That's because it was not mead." Loki clapped a hand on Thor's shoulder and stood up, walking away at a brisk pace.

"What did you give me?!" Thor asked, no accused, after him. Loki was already standing in the doorway, but he turned on his heels and said, "Worry not, brother, it was not harmful. Lets just say, I introduced you to a popular stress reliever found on earth."

Loki then laughed loudly and walked back down the hallway, disappearing from sight and leaving a stunned, embarrassed Thor to the privacy of his humiliation.

**And that was our friend Thor when he gets a little tipsy. Don't forget to leave me a request! Reviews are loved!**


	2. Steve

**Thanks to Shadow The Assassin for the idea. This was really fun to write! **

Steve sat rigidly, his hands on his knees. He would never admit how nervous he was right now. Whose damn idea was this anyway? Loud music made it difficult for him to think, and flashing lights of all different colors danced in his vision, causing him to suffer bouts of dizziness. On the huge dance floor, a large group of women showing far more skin than he was used to swayed their hips back and forth, smoked, and held drinks in their hands. He averted his eyes, feeling dirty just looking at the girls exposed flesh, and he noticed other men in the club looking hungrily in their direction. He shook his head, and dropped his gaze to the floor. Suddenly he felt someone flop down next to him. He looked over and saw Tony, cigar in one hand, and a bottle of vodka in another. Tony pulled the cigar from his mouth and blew the smoke in his direction. Steve coughed and waved his hand through the air in front of him, his eyes burning.

"I didn't know you smoked," Steve managed to choke out.

"Neither did I," Tony yelled over the sound of the music. Even though the sickeningly strong smell of smoke on his breath, there was the underlying scent of alcohol.

Bruce came up behind him and clapped a hand on his shoulder and Steve looked to him for an explanation.

"Oh, he's drunk." Bruce replied as if that was an explanation in itself, having heard enough of the conversation to understand the puzzlement in his eyes.

"Already?" Steve asked, craning his neck to follow Bruce as he walked around the couch to sit next to Tony.

"Here Cap!" Tony shouted, shoving the bottle of unopened vodka into Steve's hands.

"I don't know what you expect me to do with this, you know I cant get drunk." Steve scoffed, twisting the cap off anyway.

"Well, I've only seen you drink three times anyway, and you know what they say, 'Four times probably wont make a difference but YOLO'." Tony said, slurring his words a bit.

Steve frowned slightly, then rose up off the couch. "I have to go to the bathroom." he informed them.

"Fine but when you come back we are so getting wasteder!" Tony yelled after him.

Bruce frowned at Tony's made up word and wondered why Tony instantly went from genius to someone with the I.Q. of a first grader when he drank.

Tony craned his neck as he watched Steve disappear around the corner, then jumped up and pulled a Ziploc bag out of his pocket. Inside, Banner saw two small white capsules. Instantly recognizing the pills, Bruce's hand shot out and grabbed Tony's wrist.

"What are you doing?!" he shouted.

"Using your pills in alcohol! With luck it will make him drunk!"

"Though's are experimental pills, Tony! They were meant to be used on me to control my episodes!" Bruce's eyes widened with fear.

"Yes and they might slow Cap's hyperactive metabolism enough for him to get drunk for the first time in eighty years!" Tony shot back. "Don't you think he deserves one night of drunken partying for all that he's gone through? The man has lost everything for Christ's sake!"

Bruce bit his lip. Tony did have a point. While all the rest of them could have drunken fun, Steve was like an outcast at parties. Even Loki showed himself more on thoughs nights than Steve. Bruce's grip loosened on Starks wrist and he wriggled out of the older mans hold, dumping both pills in the vodka and closing the bottle back up. They fizzed like Alka-Seltzer for a moment than vanished completely. Just in time to, for Steve came back around the edge of the couch and grabbed the bottle, gulping a large amount down.

"This is good!" Steve said, looking at the label. He took another long drink. Bruce cast a worried glance at Tony, who simply shrugged his shoulders.

XXxXxXxXxXx

Bruce watched, horrified, as Steve clambered over the tables, and over people. He was singing (well, screaming) all the wrong words to the song now blaring through the speakers (Sexy and I Know It) and rudely stepping on people and on tables and kicking the occasional drink off the table much to someone's dismay. Suddenly he gagged, and a couple people flinched away. Steve regained his composer and yelled, "False alarm!" The people at the tables cheered him on, and someone, Bruce didn't see who, tucked a dollar bill into the waistband of Cap's jeans. Tony nudged him and pulled out his phone.

"This was a great idea!" he yelled as he pressed the record button.

Bruce gaped. "Why are you recording this?"

"I'm sure some Captain America fan girls would love to see Mr. Perfect drunk and stupid!" Tony called back, bursting out with laughter when one of the flimsy tables Cap had been dancing on tilted, causing the drunken super solider to face-plant on the floor.

"You're cruel, Tony, so cruel." Bruce muttered back, but he now had a relaxed smile on his face. Cap struggled to his feet and out onto the dance floor were they lost sight of him. Tony put his phone away. Bruce noticed that wherever Cap went, a large group of people seemed to follow him, smiling and laughing and daring him to do stuff.

"He sure is the life of the party!" Bruce yelled.

"Yep!" Tony smiled then said mockingly, "That's my boy!"

Bruce rolled his eyes. He looked back over to the crowd of people and searched the sea of faces for Steve's he had just given up when he heard an unmistakable voice cry out, "Who wants to play a game of strip poker?" There was a chorus of "yeah!" that rose up and half the room gravitated over to where the voice had come from. Bruce turned toward Tony and started, "Do you think we should try and stop him?"

He was talking to an empty seat however, and turned his attention back to the floor where he saw Tony, running to the circle, with his phone recording.

"This is SO going on Youtube!" he yelled over his shoulder at Bruce.

Bruce shook his head and grabbed his coat. he exited the building and got in his car. He started it and settled down to wait, the corners of his mouth tugged upward in a faint grin.

**Don't forget to review with suggestions and comments on how you thought I did.**


	3. Everyone

"Alright does everyone know the rules?" Tony called out loudly. The avengers were chatting and laughing, all sitting in a row at the bar in the Avengers tower. Somehow Thor had managed to talk Loki into joining them for this contest. As turns out, the trickster is actually quite competitive. In front of each of them, was a shot glass. They got quiet when they heard Tony speak.

"First one to puke, fall over, or pass out loses. You can also drop out if you want, but then you'll just get called a pussy for a while." Tony restated as he went around, filling everyone's shot glass.

"Hey!" Steve snapped, "Watch the language!"

"Sorry." Tony said in a way that it was clear he wasn't. "Cap, take one of those pills." Tony commanded as he passed by, dropping a white pill on the counter.

"Drat, I thought you had forgotten." Steve muttered but grudgingly took the pill anyway.  
"Alright." Tony said as each of them took their glass. "Go!" everyone downed his or her drink.

Loki's face twisted as the burning drink went down, and Thor frowned heavily. That was hardly a reaction though, and they had regained their composure almost instantly, smiles breaking over their faces as everyone else coughed and choked.

"Good lord that's strong!" Natasha sputtered, her face twisted in a heavy grimace. Clint, his eyes watering, nodded in agreement and coughed again. Steve hit his chest a couple of times, coughing and wheezing, not used to alcohol at all. Bruce removed his glasses and choked out, "This is horrible."

Even Tony looked surprised. "I did not expect that." He stated bluntly, but filled up his glass again anyway. He passed the bottle to Cap, which filled his glass and passed it down the line.

"Anybody dropping out?" Steve rasped.

"ANOTHER!" Thor announced loudly, making his brother flinch.

"Okay then." Cap murmured, picking up his glass.

"Go!"

This time everyone except Thor and Loki hesitated to drink it. The second time it went down easier, but there was still a fair amount of sputtering and choking. By the time the third shot was giving only faces were made by everyone (save the muted cough from Steve) and by the time the fifth shot rolled around, everyone was wasted. Clint leaned back a little to far and fell backwards from his bar stool, landing with a loud "Ooof!"

Laughter rose up from everyone.

"You're out!" Thor bellowed, his words slurring.

"I demand a rematch!" Clint mumbled drunkenly. He hadn't moved from his spot on the floor.

"Go away loser!" Natasha grumbled.

"I think I'll just chill here for awhile…" he replied.

Six shots. Seven shots. Steve got up suddenly, knocking the bar stool over and running to the sink, where he threw up violently.

"I was defrosting some chicken in there!" Tony wailed.

"You're out!" Loki shouted, pointing at him. The sudden movement made the world spin around the trickster however, and he gripped the countertop trying to steady himself.

Eight shots. Nine shots. Ten shots. Bruce got up and joined Steve at the sink.

Eleven Shots. Twelve shots. Natasha was laughing hysterically with Loki, before she suddenly lost consciousness and passed out on the countertop.

When the thirteenth shot was poured, a very pale Tony lifted the glass to his lips. Thor and Loki did the same, and everyone stared over the rim of the cup at each other to see if someone would give. Tony swallowed hard and began to shake, before the glass slipped from his hand and hit the floor, shattering.

"I'm out…" he barely got the words out before hitting the floor and beginning to snore loudly.

"Maybe we should stop too…" Thor said slowly, dragging out each word.

"I'm not even that drunk." Loki replied, swaying back and forth. As if to punctuate that he hiccupped and stood unsteadily, falling on Thor. The force knocked both of them back onto the floor and the lay next to each other laughing.

"Oh, this was such a bad idea!" Thor wheezed as he laughed.

"I cannot feel my legs!" Loki whimpered, still laughing.

"I cannot feel my face!" Thor gasped, which only made his brother laugh harder. They fell silent then, and then turned to look at each other. After moment they burst out laughing again, for no apparent reason.


End file.
